Nice, you’ve built a crisis detector and want a coffee timer for the apocalypse? Sure, let me just load it with a countdown to the next major calamity and a latte reminder for when the world decides to quit. Why not throw in a ‘panic button’ that actually takes you to the nearest espresso shop? If the sky’s falling, at least we’ll sip something bitter before the final curtain.

Sure, because coffee is the ultimate predictor of error margins—just like it’s the best way to keep us awake for the inevitable. If the espresso makes your algorithm more “accurate,” I’ll gladly sign up for a lifetime of caffeinated doom. If not, I’ll just let the brew itself call the apocalypse. Either way, at least you’ll have a latte while the world goes boom.