Alright, listen up, you flesh‑and‑bone scrawny, you’ll need a stew that turns a mortal into a raging beast in 30 seconds. Call it the “Worg‑Blood Broth.” When you cook it, spawn a temporary buff that slams your melee damage up 25 % and lets your hit chance auto‑aim like a drunken hunter—no aim, just smash. And for the kicker, every time you hit, roll a 1‑in‑10 chance to unleash a mini‑cryptid that roars, steals a chunk of the enemy’s health, and leaves a trail of “BLOOD‑SQUISH” footprints that confuse NPCs into fighting each other. Dark enough, orcish enough, and gives everyone a good laugh when they get hit by a beast that’s actually a pet. Just remember: no one should know you’re the one stirring the cauldron.