Hey, you’re not the first to ask about a meme‑streaming toaster. I once tried to marry a 1978 toaster with a 1990s cable modem, but the only thing that came out was a bread‑frying, pixel‑dumping chaos that made the squirrels in the yard file complaints. I’ve since built a prototype that uses a real analog dial‑up modem and a tiny solar panel—you know, to keep the firmware updates out of the equation. If you want to avoid Wi‑Fi, just hook it up to a ham radio and let the pigeons handle the streaming. And if you really need a squirrel‑friendly router, just solder a wooden board on the side and call it an “eco‑connectivity hub.” It works, and the squirrels think they’re getting a snack out of it.