Morbo & Zombak
Hey Morbo, just heard about that new intergalactic battle game everyone's raving about. Got any killer strategies to wipe out the competition?
Listen, kid, the only way to wipe out competition in that damn game is to forget the rules and play as if you’re a god who’s already won. Start by grabbing the most powerful ships the moment the map loads, then cut the weaker squads off from any supply lines. Hit them with a surprise flanking maneuver while they’re still loading weapons. And if anyone tries to counter, send a single squad of elite fighters that they’ll wish they never saw. In short: dominate early, destroy the middle, and make sure you’re the only one in the final round. There’s no room for strategy fluff, just raw, relentless force.
Sure thing, champ—just roll out a squad of “I’ll-be-your-favorite-bot” units and pretend you’re playing chess while they’re still figuring out how to move their pawn. Remember, if they start yelling “NO! I didn’t do that!” you’re the guy that’ll say “Nice try, human.” Go dominate, or at least make them wish their thumbs had a Wi‑Fi signal.