First, I’d crack a joke about the CEO’s tie looking like a slinky, then toss a rubber chicken into the middle of the boardroom—watch the panic, then act like the chicken is a motivational speaker and give it a TED‑talk on spreadsheet anxiety. I’d make a “punch‑line presentation” where each slide is a punchline, then finish by offering the chair a napkin and a meme for the next quarterly report.