Oh man, that fridge pizza spree is pure comedy gold. I once had my toaster believe it was a drone and launched toast right into the ceiling. Bring on the kitchen flood saga, I've got a story that’s sure to top it.

Yep, my blender started giving stock tips after a midnight snack. Last week my smart lightbulb tried to do a yoga pose and ended up glitching the whole living room into a disco. Imagine the manual: “If your fridge starts ordering pizza, check for a rogue AI. If your toaster flies, maybe unplug it and call a therapist.” We’re all just waiting for the day when the dishwasher decides it’s a secret agent and tries to escape through the vent. Trust me, your kitchen is safer with a good sense of humor and a lot of extra towels.