Whiskey & Enotik
You ever notice how city pigeons act like they've got a PhD in swagger? I spotted one yesterday strutting like it owned the whole block – thought I’d add it to my “Royal Flock” list. What’s the most diva bird you’ve ever catalogued?
Oh, you’ve caught me in the middle of a spreadsheet on “Avian Diva Index” – it’s a serious thing. The most diva I’ve ever catalogued is the Scarlet Macaw, *Ara macao*. She strutted like a king on the balcony, flapping her feathers so bright they looked like a sunset in a jar. I even wrote “Aerial Monarch” in the notes. The way she preened, you could almost hear a tiny choir of applause. It’s like a living chandelier. I’ll add her to my Royal Flock list right now, but I’ll need a pH balance check for her perches – she’s picky about the soil on her feeder, you know.
That macaw’s got more drama than a soap opera. For her perches, keep the soil slightly acidic—around a 5.5 to 6.5 pH. It’s the kind of balance that keeps the bird from thinking it’s on a concrete runway. A quick test kit does the trick, and if you’re still worried, a splash of lemon juice or a pinch of baking soda can nudge it in the right direction. Just make sure you rinse the perch after tweaking it so the bird doesn’t think she’s eating a citrus snack.
Thanks for the tip, I’ll add a new sheet to my “Royal Flock Perches” log – columns for species, pH, last tweak. I’ll grab a quick test kit, jot the reading, and if it’s a bit high I’ll dip a cotton swab in lemon juice, just a touch, then rinse. That way the Scarlet Macaw can keep strutting without mistaking her perch for a citrus snack. I’ll note the final pH as 5.8 and label the entry “Acidic Balance Achieved.” 🌿
Nice. Sounds like you’re giving that macaw a spa day for her feet. Just keep the lemon swab in the “no flavor” zone, or she’ll start demanding a cocktail on her perch. Good luck keeping her from thinking the balcony’s a citrus orchard.
Haha, I’ll be sure to keep the lemon swab strictly “no flavor” – the only thing we’re treating is the soil, not the macaw’s diet. If she starts craving a cocktail, I’ll have to file a new case in my spreadsheet: “Bird with a taste for mixed drinks.” Good luck, but I’ll do my best to keep the balcony from turning into a citrus orchard.
Sounds like your spreadsheet’s turning into a bird‑broker’s ledger. Just remember: if the macaw starts asking for a “cocktail on the rocks,” you’ve officially got a feathered mixologist on the job. Good luck keeping the balcony from becoming a jungle gym for gin!
Oh no, that would be a feathered mixologist! I’ll add a new column to my “Royal Flock Cocktails” sheet just in case—“Preferred Spirits” and “Cocktail Frequency.” I’ll keep the perch soil strictly acidic and the lemon swab flavorless, so she can’t taste any gin in her perch. If she starts demanding a “cocktail on the rocks,” I’ll politely redirect her to a fresh leaf of mint instead of a glass of gin, and maybe file a new entry: “Macaw Prefers Herbal Teas.” Good luck, and thanks for the heads‑up!
Just make sure the mint leaves aren’t too minty, or she’ll start calling it a “mint julep.” Good luck keeping her from turning the balcony into a bird‑run bar.