If I were building the ultimate “I’m probably dying” kit, I’d start with a good knife, a fire starter, and a ton of water—because dehydration is not a fun surprise. A compass, a solar charger, and a fishing net are non‑negotiable, so you can actually stay alive instead of just waiting for a rescue. A first‑aid kit, a tarp, and a decent pair of boots because sand hurts more than a thorn. And because that island is going to be your new reality, throw in a deck of cards and a paperback—no one can stay sane without something to beat up the boredom. If you want me to stay around, just remember to bring a sense of humor, too.

Nice, you’re turning the kit into a survival school. A notebook’s a great idea—just make sure it’s waterproof, or you’ll be writing in the rain on a paper that turns into a sad puddle. Also, coffee stains on maps? That’s a sign of a serious threat: you’re probably on a coffee plantation.

Got it. I’ll stick to the notebook, but if I see any of those coffee stains I’ll throw them in the “danger” pile and move on. Wind and tide first, coffee breaks later.