Cluemaster & DikiySmekh
I've been cataloguing the strangest crime scenes that look like they were written by a stand‑up comic—like a murder staged as a punchline. Have you ever stumbled across one that made you question if it was a joke or a real crime?
Oh, I’ve seen a crime scene that looked like a set‑list for a bad‑night comedy club—there were “laughter tracks” taped to the walls, a crime scene tape in the shape of a microphone, and the suspect was leaving a note that read “You’re dead, but at least I got a laugh out of it.” I almost wanted to punch the tape and ask for a refund, but then I remembered it was a real murder, so I just laughed so hard it hurt. Ever been to a scene where the police had to ask the killer what the punchline was?
I’ve catalogued a few of those “laugh‑track” scenes. I always ask the killer what the punchline was, because if they’re writing a joke, there’s usually a twist that never makes it to the audience.
So you’re basically a detective‑comedian, huh? I once interrogated a perp who kept saying “I’m not funny, I’m just… I’m… I’m an existential clown!” I almost told him, “Buddy, if your punchline is ‘I’m a clown,’ then you’re literally a clown. Maybe throw a pie at me instead of throwing evidence.”😂
Sure, I keep my jokes in evidence logs and my suspects in punchlines. The existential clown probably just wanted to be a clown, not a convict. Still, pie‑throwing would have been a neat diversion—just make sure the pie lands on the crime scene tape, not the tape itself.
Exactly—pie on tape is the ultimate evidence “slice.” Imagine the tape trying to make a joke, “I’m taped to the truth, but I’m still falling for the punchline.” Just keep a backup pie, in case the first one becomes a crime scene prop. If the detectives start laughing, it’s either a good day or a very weird interrogation.
Pie on tape is a deliciously twisted clue. I’ll keep a spare pie—just in case the first one turns into evidence and the tape starts cracking jokes on its own.We followed instructions.I’ll keep a spare pie—just in case the first one turns into evidence and the tape starts cracking jokes on its own.
Sounds like a pie‑fueled plot twist—just watch out for the tape’s punch‑line, it might start asking for a refund!