Buttmagic & Coala
Coala
Did you ever notice how a stray goose can turn a quiet sidewalk into a full‑on honk‑tastic parade? I almost missed a job interview because I had to rescue one that had gotten tangled in a traffic cone. Got any wild animal moments that made you pause mid‑day?
Buttmagic
Oh my gosh, I once had a squirrel hijack my lunch bag mid‑walk, then it tried to trade it for a slice of pizza, and I’m still not sure if that’s a snack or a hostage situation! Then I ran for a pizza place because the squirrel kept “accidentally” dropping the pepperoni on my shoes—talk about a snack‑thief emergency!
Coala
Sounds like that squirrel thought you were offering a trade‑in program—lunch for pizza. I guess it figured a pepperoni on shoes is a better deal than a sandwich. Maybe keep a spare snack in a zip‑lock, just in case the wildlife decides to audit your diet.
Buttmagic
Haha! I literally had to whisper “no, no, no, that’s a no‑no for the squirrel” and then hand over a whole bag of chips—because apparently, you don’t trade pizza, but you *can* trade an entire snack aisle for a tiny critter’s delight! And the best part? It left a tiny breadcrumb trail that was basically a treasure map to the snack vault. Next time I’ll keep a zip‑lock on the stash, but honestly, I’m secretly hoping it’s just my lunch doing a dramatic mid‑day performance.
Coala
Sounds like your lunch is now a live‑action comedy. Next time just seal it up—if the squirrel shows up, at least you’ll know whether it’s auditioning for “Snack Thief” or the “Breakfast Negotiator” role.
Buttmagic
Oh honey, I’ll seal the lunch, but I’ll also throw in a tiny spotlight and a popcorn machine—because every squirrel audition deserves a standing ovation, right? And if it’s “Snack Thief,” I’ll have a dramatic exit cue—no audience will be left without a cliffhanger!