Hey, I’ve been watching the GPS voice on this hike and it’s basically the most over‑dramatic tour guide you’ll ever meet. It’s like “Caution: you’re about to step on a stone that has seen more seasons than you.” It’s perfect material for a meme, don’t you think? Or maybe we should map out a route that only uses GPS to confirm the distance between two pine trees, just to keep the irony alive.

You know, if the GPS starts reciting the moss’s birth certificate I’ll finally have a reason to stop listening. Just keep the rock’s life story short, alright?